Age is Not a Contagious Disease!

I went out last night, decided to skip the club night with the girls (I'm not much of a club goer). Went to the local tavern instead. Chatted it up with a very cute guy. We hit it off immediately, easy conversation. We made each other laugh. Liked the same music and movies. We enjoyed several drinks together over several hours of great conversation. But then the age question arose. And I knew he was probably a bit younger; I didn't realize he was only 26. Yikes, 26. For me, that was 11 years ago! I can't tell you how fast he got out of there after realizing how much older I am. I know I probably don't have much in common with a 26 year old. I know I have tons more baggage (a divorce, a kid, a slew of exes), but couldn't we at least hang out and be friends? Is that just impossible? Was Harry right when he said that women and men cannot be just friends?

Embrace the Loneliness

I have decided to embrace my loneliness. I have spent over a year being lonely as hell, meanwhile dating many guys to no avail. But right now I just need to focus on being my own best friend. I realize how hard this is for me, given that I have always been seeing someone. I have floated from one guy to the next with little time in between. And, for that reason, I am not used to this lonely feeling. But this is good for me. It gives me time to explore myself as I never have before. My biggest downfall in life has been to follow in the footsteps of the guy of the moment. I dropped out of college because of a guy (actually one that I was running away from and one that I was running to). I didn't go to L.A. to pursue acting because of a guy (he didn't want to go and yet now he lives there and is successful in the biz and engaged to Madonna's assistant). I didn't pursue my dream of acting because I got married to a guy. And I have moved more times than I want to admit because of a guy. I need to stop changing my life because of my endless quest to find the right guy. I need to focus on me and my own happiness. And truthfully, I have, in some ways, liked being alone. I can watch whatever I want on tv. I discipline my son the way I want without anyone telling me I am doing it wrong. I can spend more time with my son. I can do what I want when I want. And I don't have to spend extra energy trying to please someone else. I think this time is crucial to my own personal development. Has it been difficult at times? Yes, but then again so are relationships. Has it been scary to realize that if I died suddenly there wouldn't be anyone there to bawl at my bedside - yes. Okay, my son would, but that is what keeps me going. My son is the most precious thing to me, and when I realize I am raising a little guy who is going to grow into one of these men of the world, well, it just makes me want to focus on making him the best guy he can be. Because some day he is going to meet a girl, and she will fall in love with him. When that happens I want to make sure he knows how to treat a girl right.

New Rules Apply

Dating today is so different now. Technology has really changed the whole scene. What with match site dating and texting and email, it really is a different world. And I'm not so sure I like it. As much as I find it easy to avoid talking to someone I don't want to converse with, I find it harder to get to know someone if you mainly communicate through texts and emails. And truthfully, I don't have time to answer my phone and chat awhile anyway. I work all day and take care of my child in the evenings. So a brief email to confirm a date works fine. But can you still really get to know someone if there is no verbal communication during the week? Does this slow the getting-to-know-you process? It seems to take away from the whole concept of a guy trying to woo a girl. What kind of romantic courtship is taking place through a text? It seems to diminish the importance of the date. It keeps it on a casual level. So is this letting guys off easy?

Meeting Mr. Right

I work in a bridal shop (yes, I know its completely ironic). One thing I always ask the brides is "How did you meet him?" Most of the time I get pretty standard answers: "Through friends", "At Church", or "At school". But I always like to hear because, I guess, part of me wonders where I will meet my Mr. Right. But when I think back to how I met the guys I dated seriously in the past, well, it wasn't so standard. My ex-husband and I met through work, which is pretty common, but we "fooled around and fell in love" which isn't. My last boyfriend - Mr. Executive - was from out of town and I met him in the Atlanta Airport. He was an international businessman in from London. I was on my way to a wedding in Florida, a case of when "two worlds collided". Then there was an ex-boyfriend (definitely a Mr. Nice Guy) who I met over a body shot of tequila (my crazy impulsiveness on that one). I guess he caught my eye right away. None of these relationships worked out in the end, obviously or I wouldn't still be single, but they were fascinating learning experiences if nothing else. I have had other boyfriends over the years who I did meet in school or through friends, but they don't stand out in my mind as much as those three probably because the relationships didn't last as long. These are three men who I dated for 2 years or more and lived with. So who knows where I will meet the next one? I believe it will be something unusual once again, when I least expect it. What is the wildest or most interesting place you ever met someone you fell for?